Thursday, May 19, 2005

The Storyboard Treatment

There are good music videos, and there are bad music videos. This is about the bad music videos. The ones that make you go 'wha...?' or, in sms, 'WTF?!' Videos that can be linked to some long-ago abuse. Videos that have nothing to do with life or love, though they depict both. Videos that tell a story, or several stories, in five minutes - including the singer's journey through life and how he or she helps the lovers reunite at the end before vanishing in a puff of glitter, and you later realise he or she's actually god/an angel/a fairy godmother.

This is for the videos that put the entertainment back in music, for those that put women where they really belong: in cholis three sizes too small. The ones that are timeless for they skip the 60s and 70s, and aim straight for the stone age, where men watch the mating dance with intoxicated eyes before dragging a mate by her mane. The ones where emotions never simmer, they roar, for happiness is depicted in a mile-wide smile, anger with an ugly frown; think yahoo emoticons on people's faces. Yes, this is for those videos. The ones that deserve The Storyboard Treatment.

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